Archive for Dating Relationship Tips
Top 45 Questions to Ask a Date
Posted by: | CommentsWhether you are just starting to Date or re-entering the Dating scene after a divorce or loss of spouse “What do you talk about?” is often a challenge. You meet a potential date online or at a social venue how do you get the conversation going? Impressions are made within 30 – 60 seconds, you only have a few minutes to see if there is chemistry between you and your date, you want to ask the right questions to see if there is compatibility. What do you talk about to make the most of your conversation?
Below is a list of suggested questions to you can ask, they can range from silly to serious: You don’t have to ask them all on the 1st Date (some might scare them off!), some are more in depth and can wait until the 2nd or 3rd Date. Read over them until you are familiar with them so they don’t sound forced or contrived.
1.What do you do for work?
It is an introductory question. It may reveal the professional status of a person but little about his personality. So move on to another question.
2.Where are you from? This reveals background. It throws better light on the person.
3.What is the one thing about yourself that you would like me to know?
More insight into personality.
4.When was your last relationship and how long did it last? A probing question that will open up the communication.
5.What are you looking for in a relationship? You can both instantly compare whether you match in this area.
6.What do you think is the most important value in a relationship?
7.Do you want to marry or have you ever been married? This is important, as it will reveal if both are moving in the same direction – towards or away from marriage.
8.What do you look for in a husband/wife? Try to elicit an honest answer.
9.Do you want/do you have any children? An important question if you are looking for a long-term relationship and your partner is not.
10.What do you do for fun? This will throw light on whether your leisure activities match. Are you a bookworm and she an outdoorsy person?
11.What are you most proud about? This reveals the basic values of the person, whether he/she values money or adventure/intellectual pursuits.
12.Is religion important to you? 24×7 living together means understanding on certain basic issues like religious beliefs.
13.Do you follow politics? Are you a Democrat or a Republican?
You can spar on your political affiliations.
14.Do you believe in love at first sight? You can decide whether he/she is a romantic person or not.
15.What is your most treasured possession and why? What a person is sentimental about reveals a great deal about his personality. Is it his bike or a locket presented by a sister?
16.What is your favorite month of the year and why? Does he like to sweat it out in summer activities or curl up like a cat in winter?
17.Which is your favorite book/movie? Both of you can discuss why you like a book or a movie – throws further in sight into personality.
18.Which is the last book you read? A conversation starter.
19.Which is the one job in the world that you would love to do?
Throws light on likes and dislikes.
20.Which is your favorite music and your favorite singer/band?
Do you share musical tastes?
21.Do you like animals/keep pets? Are you going to clash on this issue – one an animal hater, the other a pet lover?
22.How do you spend your spare time? This is important, as it will really help if both love to do the same things in spare time.
23.Where do you see yourself in five years time? Watch out if he has no definite goals for the future and is in a rut. A positive mark for her if she has her life and career planned out positively.
24.If you were an animal in the wild, what would you be?
Silly, amusing question to get the laughs.
25.Do you believe a cup is half empty or half full? Are you an optimist or a pessimist?
26.If you could travel back through time, what single mistake would you correct in life. What are the deepest regrets of a person?
27.You have got six months to live, what will you do first?
Insight into personality.
28.Is sexual compatibility important to you? Do opinions match?
29.Who was your hero, as a child? Insight into personality.
30.If you won a lottery, how would you spend your millions?
Amusing question just for laughs.
31.Which was the first crush you ever had? Reminiscing sentiments.
32.What makes you laugh/cry? Really important and throws light on personality.
33.If you have friends coming over, what would you cook?
34.Describe your perfect holiday. One thinks frozen Alaska, the other sunny Australia.
35.Which T.V. program would you never miss? Do your tastes match?
36.What is the last CD you bought?
37.Are you a morning person or a night person? Will you ever spend common time?
38.Would you like to climb a mountain or trek across a desert?
Will you ever agree on holidays?
39.What adjective would a close friend use to describe you?
Friendly or idiotic.
40.If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
41.Into which personality�s shoes would you like to step for a day?
Says a lot about your taste.
42.Who is you favorite actor/actress/celebrity and why?
43.Who is your favorite sportsperson?
44.What is your favorite sporting activity?
45.Which is your favorite genre of movies – comedy/thriller/action?
Thank you to the guys at SpeedDating.com for sharing their questions. Remember these questions are suggestions, feel free to change them to suit your interests and personality. Most of all – take the time to LISTEN to the replies and ANSWER their questions. If any REPLIES send up RED FLAGS or the hair on the back of your neck stands up TRUST your instinct. Employers do pre-employment background checks, why shouldn’t you check out your Date? (http:www.CheckOutADate.com) LADIES make sure you meet that 1st Date at a public place, don’t have him pick you up at your home! You wouldn’t invite a door-to-door salesman into your home would you? Men don’t be offended the ladies are just being cautious, there are a few weirdo’s out there.
I am thinking of turning these questions into a pocket size game like Trivial Pursuit for Dating. Would love your comments.
Women’s Dating Resolutions for the New Year
Posted by: | CommentsDid you make resolutions for the New Year? Most of us make resolutions to change things in our lives; lose weight, stop smoking, get more exercise, be kinder, or be a better parent. Sometimes they are so big that we soon give them up. The first month of the year is over, how are you doing on your resolutions? How motivated are you in what you want to accomplish? Have you ever thought about Dating Resolutions?
Recently, “It’s Just Lunch” had an article on their blog www.itsjustlunchblog.com about Dating Resolutions for women and men. This is a “premier Dating Service for busy professionals” that arranges meetings usually over lunch between single professionals. Evan Marc Katz, author of “Why You’re Still Single: Things Your Friends Would Tell You I You Promised Not To Get Mad” came up with 10 Dating Resolutions for Women. ( I have added to it)
1. Make an effort – get out there, nothing happens in a vacuum.
2. Don’t take things personally-not every man is going to be your soul mate. As the saying goes you have to “kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince”, while dating you can define the qualities you are looking for.
3. Do nothing-once you have met him, it’s his job to follow up. I know it’s hard but guys still like to feel like they are in charge. If a guys really cares he will let you know!
4.Stay open- don’t limit yourself by too specific “wants” like profession, location, amount of hair, weight, height (height is one of my “biggies” I am not comfortable with guys shorter than me). You never know he maybe a diamond in the rough and you know we love diamonds!
5.Be positive-no one wants to be around a negative person. This is a deal killer for me, I can tell on the first phone call whether I want to date a guy by how he talks about himself, family or life. Don’t bring up all the things that went wrong in your last relationship or life.
6.Don’t try to change men-they not made of play dough or clay although some may act like it. You can’t change the way they grew up, some habits may be able to be changed, weight loss, physical activity, learn sports or dancing. If you try or expect them to change you will both be unhappy. Would you want some guy to try and change you?
7.Change your focus- look for qualities you would look for in a friend not just as a lover. No matter how good a lover he is if he doesn’t have good vertical qualities and doesn’t treat you the way deserve he‘s not right for you.
8.Be humble- when you are mentally critiquing your date he might be doing the same to you.
9.Forgive the ignorance-guys just want you to like them but often don’t know how to go about it. One of the things I look for is whether in the first conversation is if they ask questions of about me. Sometimes they just talk on and on in answer to my questions but don’t seem like they want to know me (a future post I will give you a list of questions). When a couple of guys meet they always seem to find a common ground and have something to talk about but when they are talking to a women they can get tongue tied.
10.Give yourself a break-dating can be difficult so just look at it as adventure, the chance to meet someone new not necessarily your soul mate. Most of all have fun!
Hopefully, this will give you some food for thought about how you want to pursue Dating in this New Year. Let me know if you come up with other Dating Resolutions to share.
Check out posting for Top 10 Resolutions for Men by Andrea Syrtash, author and host of “On Dating”.
Men’s Dating Resolutions for the New Year
Posted by: | CommentsDid you make resolutions for the New Year? Most of us make resolutions to change our lives for the better like lose weight, stop smoking, get more exercise, be kinder, or be a better parent. Sometimes they are so big that we soon give them up. January is over how are you doing on your resolutions? How motivated are you in what you want to accomplish? Have you ever thought about Dating Resolutions?
Recently, “It’s Just Lunch” had an article on their blog www.itsjustlunchblog.com about Dating Resolutions for women and men. This is a “premier Dating Service for busy professionals” that arranges meetings usually over lunch between single professionals. This article for men was by Andrea Syrtash, dating expert, life coach, author and host of “On Dating” produced by NBC Digital Studios. Her third book “He’s Just Not Your Type (and that’s a good thing) “ will be published by Rodale in April 2010.
Andrea’s top 10 Dating Resolutions for men: ( I have added to it)
1.Date the person not the potential-you are more likely to find success in love if you are realistic about how she is right now. She can develop new interests but if she really is not interested in something you are or to the same degree (like sports or motorcycles) it is probably not going to change no matter how good you make her feel. To be fair some women have been known to exaggerate their interest to appear more desirable. Shame on us…you wouldn’t see a man getting all excited about sewing or shopping just to score points with us.
2.Listen to your date’s words, but put credence in her actions –if she tells you how important you are to her but can’t find time for you, take the hint she may not be ready to commit.
3.Take Risks-step outside your comfort zone and try something new. If you keep going to the same places or doing the same things ( you tend to get the same results) but not finding the kind of women you want then you need to look elsewhere.
4.Be Open-you cannot find true intimacy without vulnerability. Protecting yourself from being hurt does not allow you to making a real connection. This is very common after a big break up just remember women have gone through similar experiences.
5.Be Resilient-not every date is going to be successful. The dating is a way to refine the criteria for the person you will fall in love with. There is no need to expect every date to be a home run unless you are really shallow and only looking to score sliding into home base horizontally.
6.Be Present –sometimes we can be so concerned about whether someone is a good match we ignore how we really feel about them. (I think women do this more than men.)
7.Be Positive –no one likes negativity, we all come into dating with past experiences. The trick is not to bring them into new relationships (one of the deal breakers when I first talk to someone is how negative they are- if all they do is grouch about life I don’t even want to go out with them).
8.Get Over an EX Who is Haunting You –do you find yourself comparing women you meet to the woman who broke your heart? Get it out of your system by writing about it, talk to a counselor or test a friend’s patience to find closure. Then leave it at the door as you head out for your date, it is over and done with so don’t bring it to a potentially rockin’ relationship.
9.Sweat the Small Stuff –Never underestimate the little things you do for your lady. It is the small everyday things that mean so much; listening, being thoughtful, a card for no reason, picking up your stuff, helping with dinner, asking if she needs help will mean as much if not more than a dozen roses that only last a little while.
10.Have Fun -make a resolution to have fun in your dating pursuits! Dating is a great opportunity to meet new people, step out of your comfort zone and try new things. Dating can be an adventure so ENJOY!
Hopefully, this will give you some food for thought about how you want to pursue Dating in this New Year. Let me know if you come up with other Dating Resolutions to share.
Check out posting for Top 10 Resolutions for Women by Evan Marc Katz, Author of “Why You’re Still Single: Things Your Friends Would Tell You If You Promised Not To Get Made”
Amazon Women video
Posted by: | CommentsI met a nice guy named Lee last Sunday at a ValleyMovieGroup.com event. I told him about my company, that I did background checks for singles. He told me about this video and then sent me the link. Not sure when the movie was made but it was a few years ago- they must have thought background checks were a good idea even then.
